A partly political broadcast

by J R Booker, the Bard of Bolsover

Anytime nar, tha’ll be coming knockin’ on me door,
Tha can get ready, anda don’t care what colour rosette tha’s gorron!
Fest question as I’m gooin’ to ask thee,
Wheers me piggin’ Post Office gone?
And, worrabart me Working Men’s Club?
It’s shut nar.  ‘Cossa thee and thi ridiculous ban on smoking.
Expecting us to go outside in rain for a fag?
At our time of life?  Tha must be joking!
Wheer are we goin’ to go now for us dominoes and crib?
And have an out of hours Extraordinary General Meeting?
Looking at  t’club now, I reckon as I know wots gooin’ on!
You buggers have got thousands of shares in corrugated sheeting!!
Am fully aware that we need two new super aircraft carriers,
Without ‘ em our lives would not be complete.
It’s much better than spending money on the police force,
What’s wrong wi’ kids runnin’ riot in the street?
And, worrabart that 100 million Eurofighter eh?  Fantastic, intit?
It can go at more than twice the speed of sound with ease.
Tha’ll have plenty o’ time to look for it while tha on hospital waiting list,
If ever tha dare go in that is, frittened of gerrin’ some incurable disease.
And, worrabart price o’ gas and lectric?
I think we all know what’s going on theer!
We don’t mind being cold, as long as we keep shareholders happy,
‘Cos, wi’art them.    country’s going nowheer!
And these poor “joy-riders” who steal thi car and set fire to it,
While they’re on drugs or completely “pissed”,
It's hard not to feel sorry for’em when they get caught,
And, if they’re unlucky, might get a slap on the wrist!
And, who come up wi’ idea of gerrin’ us to use public transport?
My, it’s a cracker that is, a real belter!
Spent thousands of pounds to put me car on road, and tha expects me to wait
Ankle-deep in brokken glass for a bus?  In a stinkin’, vandalised shelter?
I’m sorry,  Mr Politician,  I’ll be ranting and raving in a bit,
I should respect your position, a leader amongst men.
I doff my cap to you,  tha dooin’ a rait good job,
Of lookin’ after thissen!!


©2008/14 - Club Historians

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